The Code

A few weeks ago, my friend's girlfriend asked him if he wanted to do shopping. Of course he gave the face, you know what I am talking about, the face that says I do not really want to go. So she says, "Well, if you don't want to go, then you don't have too." He then said, "Ok, I will stay here." Well, you know what happened then, she said, "Well, fine!" and then she went off in a huff.
The next time I saw him, he tells me what transpired. I say, Mark, Mark, Mark, Mark. Don't you know the code?"
He says, "The Code? What's the code?"
I proceed to tell him that he must not know the code, or he would never have had the experience of his girlfriend walking off in a huff and being annoyed with him later.
Well, the code is very simple, but complicated at the same time. If a woman says that if you do not want to, it is ok, you should never answer, well ok. Your response should be, ok, I will.
He then proceeds to say that this is ridiculous and why don't they just say I want you to go shopping with me.
I laughed and told him once you are married, this will all make sense. A woman is not going to tell you out right that she wants you to come, because if she does this, then you say yes and she feels guilty. That is something she doesn't want to live with, the guilt.
The guilt is on you, the boyfriend, the husband or the father, because at an early age, they learn this very well, from no other than their mother. I would know this, because my daughters have done this to me many times.
So the next time she asks, if you don't want to go, you don't have too. You have two choices. You either go with her or you don't and you live with the guilt and the silence or the argument later on.
What I am trying to say here is, do not feel that you have to go every time. Weigh the cons against the pros. If you want to go, then go, but if you do not want to, then stay. Stick to your choice and live with it.